If You Have Nothing Nice To Say...

I have a few friends who don't have children. I have a few friends who only understand the single life. Who are great "aunties," but have no idea what it takes to be the mother. They never feel the heartbreak. They don't understand "tough love." They are opinionated and have a lot to say about a lot of things that they don't know about.

The best thing about single, non-mother friends, is that they are willing to listen to a mother. They are able to listen for hours about things they don't understand. They listen to what seems to be nonsense. Then, they often judge.

Opinions are simply that. There is no right way or wrong way to raise a child. We do what we do based on how our children will react. We make decisions based on what we think is best for our child at the time. There are a lot of debatable conversations.

My all time debatable conversation is circumcision. Why do we circumcise? Is it merely for aesthetics? Do we want our sons to feel "normal?" Do we do it for health reasons? Are we too lazy to clean the area? Are we just following what others have told us?

My sons are both circumcised. Isaiah was circumcised in Hawaii where we found that he has very, very mild hypospadius. (Not the type of hypospadius where the penis is bent.) Josiah, also has very, very mild hypospadius and was circumcised by the Chief Of Urology at Sunnyside Medical Center.

I did not decide to do this surgery to my boys. I don't have a penis. I have no idea how it would feel to have the penis cut surgically. So, I left it up to my husband. He said to do it. He claimed health issues. (He had a family story to tell. I will save you details.) Of course, I cried when the surgeries were done. I cry whenever the boys are hurt physically and/or emotionally.

The surgery, however, is debatable. It doesn't have to be done. We didn't need to "claim health issues." But, I don't feel that someone who doesn't have a child should talk to me about my right to circumcise my sons. It is up for debate. You can choose to leave your son's penis intact, whole, but I chose otherwise. It is my right to do so and anyone who is not a parent should not judge my decision. It is simply up for debate.